New Developments

The universe has been pointing me in another direction the past few months... It has been leading me away from conventional medicine toward holistic treatments, and the final sign for me was when my appointment for another ketamine evaluation had to be rescheduled for whatever the reason was that they couldn't keep the appointment I scheduled (double booked probably).

Inbetween crazy crazy grad school days, I had a friend visit this past weekend, and it was a rejuvenating experience. We only had eyes for eachother, and enjoyed our time together putting other duties on the back burner.

Nothing Can Touch Me

I have not written much lately for several reasons. First, grad school sucks every ounce of energy and life that I have in my energy reserve out of me (think of the spoon theory fellow disease fighters)... and I still don't finish what I have to do. Second, I've hit a point of acceptance where I just do and I don't ask questions. What do I mean by that? There are some non-negotiables right now... I WILL finish grad school, I WILL become licensed, I WILL practice therapy with the chronic/acutely ill and their support systems. I just have to figure out how, and sometimes, I have to go back to the drawing board and re-contract when the disease gets in the way. This is just the way it is right now. It's difficult, and once a week I think I might give up... about twice a week, I am sure I'm giving up, but I never will.

One update is that on Dec. 5th, I am going back into the city to set a date for a 10 day out-patient IV ketamine infusion. Am I excited about it? Not particularly. Do I have any other sensible options at the moment to ensure a remission safely (if that even exists)? Not particularly. It is what it is, and I find moments of joy elsewhere.

Oh, and, GO OBAMA!!!!!