My Last Two Spiritual Awakenings Explained

**Before we get started, visit Lynn Walker's own personal blog here. She updates it regularly with great spiritual information.**

Hi, healers! I promised I would explain to you the two spiritual awakenings I had right before I was admitted into the hospital. With the help of Lynn Walker, my amazingly talented spiritual advisor, these awakenings were possible and my existance shifted dramatically. Here we go!

I Love My RSD/CRPS:

Since my spiritual quest began, I have understood that total and unconditional love is the strongest emotion and can cure all ills. God is love. Love is God. Until recently, 99% of me loved my RSD/CRPS and felt gratitude for the gifts it has given me, but I could not persuade that last 1% to take the love plunge. The love was conditional (we are all familiar with conditional love), based upon the amount of pain I was in and my limitations on any given day. After much prayer, meditation, reading, and asking for guidance, it all clicked.  In an instant, any anger, resentment, sorrow, etc. left me as if it never existed. The epiphany was that profound. That's how spiritual awakenings work, you know? Something you have been struggling with for years is realized and released in one moment. It is powerful, profound, and tides you over with hope and faith until the next one comes around.

God/Source/Creator Heals

The last several years, I have been counting on science, doctors, and medicine to heal me, constantly looking outside of myself for the answers. Remember, I was a jaded former Roman Catholic turned hardcore atheist, experiencing a monumental seperation from God around age 18. The all powerful, omnipresent, judging, fear-inducing, punishing God of modern religions put such a pungent taste in my mouth that it turned me off of all organized religions, although I did go on to study religion in undergrad. Because their version of God did not resonate with me, I came to the conclusion that there was no God, furthering my seperation from my core self, others, and a higher power.

Not long after my pain started, I began the endless search for healing, only considering external options for several years. It wasn't until I turned inward and began the difficult but rewarding process of self-knowing that the tides began to turn (self-knowing eradicates ego and brings you into oneness with God). My last spiritual awakening before entering into the hospital (literally three days before I was admitted) for my ketamine infusion was that ketamine was not going to cure me. Huh? Yes, you read that correctly! God/Source/Creator heals, and this loving energy uses science, doctors, and medicine as its tools (because it is the source of all creation). I firmly believe that without that realization, the ketamine wouldn't have been so successful.

Did I do an OK job of explaining these to you? It can be difficult to put spiritual awakenings into words, but I am more than happy to answer any questions and go further into detail. I am going to elaborate for a guest blogger post on crazysexylife.com soon.

Any spiritual puzzles you are working on concerning your healing? Self-love, self-forgiveness, judgment of yourself and others, fear of the future, loving your illness, etc.? We can talk about these, and if you are uncomfortable, remember you can e-mail me privately (mariamoooney@comcast.net) or ask me anonymous questions on my formspring page. I will address them in detail on my blog so everyone can benefit. Remember, these aspects of our human existances are keeping us in the sick role. We must believe we are healed and transcend!

Happy Healing!