Hi, healers! My Dr. Oz experience was serendipitous and amazing. I networked and met so many wonderful people in the hospice and palliative care fields, including LCSW's, board members, doctors, and lawyers (all involved in some way or another in either treating/counseling the terminally ill and their loved ones or creating, advocating for, and passing legislation).
The "celebrity" guests were Montel Williams (love him!), Dr. Byock (a prominent figure in hospice and palliative care and also my father's childhood buddy - imagine his surprise as he sat in the audience!), a woman from Oregon involved in Death with Dignity, and some narcissistic a**hole psychiatrist. Excuse my language, but his personality leaves an awful taste in my mouth. He is grandiose and disrespectful, and I hope he is aware that he comes off that way, although a true narcissist will not care. His inflated sense of self and his lack of empathy for anyone but himself is deeply and profoundly disturbing. Sicko.
I never once mentioned to the show that I live with RSD because I am so darn sick of talking and thinking about it. I thought, "for once I am going speak from a personal and professional experience with my LSW hat on." Think again! Before taken to her correct seat, a woman sat down next to me, and being the social worker I am, I asked what her position was on death with dignity. Imagine my surprise when she said she was for the laws because her son committed suicide one month ago due to 10 years of poor pain management for his chronic pain condition, RSD! I told her I also live with the disease, and she grabbed my hand and began to sob. Of course, I broke down, too. It was deeply moving for the both of us.
We were going to speak together, but someone who was so arrogantly against the laws was attacking Montel Williams and took up our slot. You might not see much of me but some horrified looks I gave listening to that jerk of a psychiatrist.
The woman to my right was an LCSW, and her last MSW student was a girl my age with RSD! What serendipity! Can you believe all of this?! We exchanged information and have been e-mailing this afternoon.
All in all, a truly enriching experience, but I really need to take it easy now. I have had five very busy and active days in a row.
Happy Healing!
10 comments:
What a momentous, moving day you've had. It's unfortunate that there are people in the world that lack empathy and a caring view of health care and compassionate issues, but that is why we need to have mature debates. It's too bad your time was taken up, but I hope it comes across in the episode that death with dignity needs to be seriously considered as a major ethical issue in North America, and that this issue should be considered on a personal level and on a level for all chronically-ill individuals.
Maria, what an incredible day! I got goosebumps reading your blog. You were really meant to be there today. I can't wait to see the show!
The universe works in such amazing ways! Wow, I've got chills!
Hi, ladies! Isn't all that amazing?! I still get the chills thinking about it, especially the woman whose son committed suicide.
Red, that man was horrifying!!! I can't believe he works in the mental health field!!! I would fire him if he were my psychiatrist. I can't imagine he has the best bed side manner.
VERY cool! Those connections were SO synchronistic because your inner & outer worlds are in great alignment! No suprise, but delightful & super cool none-the-less!
xoxo
Thank you! I'd like to think so, too :-)
You are obviously a very bright and caring person as well as an engaging writer. While I'm much saddened to hear of your RSD, it does give you reason to embrace to Death With Dignity movement at an age when few people do. Please stay active and keep lending your voice.
I am a fellow activist in Califonia, a member of both Final Exit Network and Compassion and Choices organizations. I'm also determined to see an Oregon-type law enacted here to put a stop to the dangerous, ungegulated and undignified steps desperate patients and their families are forced to take now.
Meanwhile, let me recommend two books: my own novel What You Wish For, a highly realistic family saga dealing with this issue; and Death With Dignity, nonfiction by Robert Orfali. Both were published in 2010.
Hi, Bill! Thank you so much for your kind words and for stopping by. I have to agree, the RSD has made me very sensitive to suffering and gave me the push to work in hospice, which is what opened my eyes to these laws. I admire what you do, and I hope to be a part of the changes I wish to see. Sending love!
Thanks for the great write up of your experience at the Dr. Oz Show. Compassion & Choices President Barbara Coombs Lee is the woman you saw that's been involved for years with Death with Dignity. Compassion & Choices does a whole host of work around improving care and expanding choice at the end of life. This includes aid in dying (aka Death with Dignity), advocacy for hospice and palliative care, helping patients and families express their end-of-life wishes and have them honored, etc.
She mentioned to me today that she was appalled at the way that the psychiatrist (Keith Ablow is his name) was so insulting to the Oregon physician. It's unfortunate that a civil discourse wasn't allowed to prevail.
Carla Axtman
Online Community Coordinator
Compassion & Choices
compassionandchoices.org
Hi, Carla! Thank you so much for reaching out to me. I didn't get her name that day, but she was a lovely woman who articulated her points beautifully. And Ablow was so rude! I was disgusted by his lack of empathy. I can't believe he is a health care professional. I really admire your work!
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